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Rustin's LiveJournal:
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| Monday, November 23rd, 2009 | | 3:55 pm |
On LJ
Holy crap its LiveJournal! | | Friday, October 3rd, 2008 | | 2:52 am |
| | Tuesday, September 30th, 2008 | | 2:52 am |
On Rolls
I just got rick rolled in total style, so it doesn't bother me one bit. | | Monday, September 22nd, 2008 | | 11:42 pm |
On departing flights.
Well there goes Autumn, off to Wisconsin. With the state of telecommunications these days its not like I'll never get to speak with her again. Which is good, because I'd be really sad if that were the case. I don't know...I sat down with the idea that I'd be writing something meaningful today. Even if it was just one of the rantings that I've been prone too lately, those are fun. A smidge of updates for my myspace...and well that's about it. Maybe I'll think of something later. Current Mood:  contentCurrent Music: Nothin | | Wednesday, April 30th, 2008 | | 2:22 am |
On raising my glass.
I'm going to ride this plane out of your life again. I wish that I could stay but you argue. More than this I wish you could've seen my face In backseat staring out the window. I'll do anything for you, Kill anyone for you. So leave yourself intact 'Cause I will be coming back. In a phrase to cut these lips, I love you. The morning will come In the press of every kiss With your head upon my chest Where I will annoy you With every waking breath Until you decide to wake up. I've earned through hope and faith The curves around your face That I'm the one you'll hold forever. If morning never comes for either one of us, Then this I pray to you wherever. I'll do anything for you. This story is for you. ('Cause I'd do anything you want me to... for you.) I'll do anything for you, Kill anyone for you. So leave yourself intact 'Cause I won't be coming back. In a phrase to cut these lips, I loved you. The morning will come In the press of every kiss With your head upon my chest Where I will annoy you With every waking breath Until you decide to wake up. The morning will come In the press of every kiss With your head upon my chest Where I will annoy you With every waking breath 'Til you decide to wake up. Current Mood: contentCurrent Music: Wake Up by Coheed and Cambria | | 1:49 am |
On the way a word is said.
I think, I think, I think...that I've got an idea about why they apologize to me so much. Haha, no not you, all of them, the ones who are hopelessly unaware that they are hopeless. Did that sound elitist? Maybe there's some intersection between rights and perspectives that I need a sign for, like "Watch for egomaniacal banter." I don't think those signs are there beceause they indicate a hazard, they're there to keep you from getting too complacent. I touched on driving a little the last time I was here so I won't bore you. Where was I? Uhm, apologies are tricky. I'm a huge fan of sincerity, it's actually a turn on, really...cuz you know you wanted to hear something like that. I'm not so much a fan of gewgaws. Or...I am, I guess. But not when the apology is, itself, a gewgaw. Heh heh, gewgaw... Anywayzzzz. The idea I have is that the apologies I get aren't a representation of any particular remorse, nor are they the product of tearful grappling with the uses to which I may be put, no matter how trivial. Instead I'm going to split some kinda hair... These apologies are meant to convey a very basic understanding that there is no degree of polite conversation or random gesture of kindness that will ever bridge the gap between the worlds we have created for ourselves. You see, they really have no choice but to behave completely 'normally' and then tack on the almighty "i'm sorry" at the end. ~It's okay that you get what you want, and its okay that you make choices. I'm not sorry for who I am and I'm not asking you to be sorry at all. Quite the opposite, in fact.~ Maybe some day they will walk differently. It could happen. As for now, as always, hope is the name of the game. I'm not alone and neither are you. I have plenty of hope, just maybe not all at the same time, hee hee. :) Hm. This is kinda fun...I've always enjoyed writing, I mean you probably already kinda knew that, huh? Sometimes it works better than others and I've had plenty of people tell me I should make a habit of it... They're probably right. Current Mood:  lonelyCurrent Music: The Crowing by Coheed and Cambria | | Tuesday, February 19th, 2008 | | 3:03 am |
On the use of the English language.
Statistically speaking, use of punctuation has dramatically declined in the U.S. and worldwide in the past decade. So has the use of turn signals. A whole safety hazard built on top of a system designed to convince us that we have somewhere to be. A mile can be just as hard for the heart to traverse as the span of a galaxy. Space and time are for our eyes only. A broken heart isn't dead. It doesn't wither away in the wind or in the moment. Two halves can have two minds. A thousand tiny pieces can have a thousand minds. It's too bad climbing a mountain means going uphill. It's very late right now. I'm still sitting right where I always have, wondering about the day, fearing it maybe, but maybe not. I can't live IN the past but I have to live WITH it. It's following me around, actually, a few punctuated moments of clarity and cloudiness, old melodies and scents and ancient thoughts and old, tired bones. Eventually I'll get tired of being this tired. And then I will go to sleep. Is it really that I have nothing better to do than to be here? Is there anything better for me now? Who could I possibly go to now? Who could I possibly pray to? Someday, the numbers on this clock will mean something, they will remind me of something. If you don't believe in Tylenol, will it stop existing? I believe that there is no day when all of this will be easier, but believing that doesn't make this any easier. I could go on about anything I wanted to...and I could be as cynical and pessimistic as anyone. But there's no reason for that. The fact is, there is at least one guiding light in this life. I'm convinced...I'm convicted. No conflict or confusion... Current Mood: Divided | | Saturday, June 23rd, 2007 | | 4:31 pm |
| | Thursday, June 21st, 2007 | | 12:52 pm |
I know you're out there, somewhere out there...
So now, it's been a bumpy ride the past few days. Continuing the tradition that began last Thursday, work has been pretty ragged. Working with so many new people and the less wonderful veterans hasn't been all that pleasant. Saturday night I was in cocktail and it was RIDICULOUSLY slow. I could hardly believe it. Then on Sunday, the GM anticipated big business during the night shift cuz it was Father's Day. So to help us along he ordered some delivery from Round Table. Even after all this time, I'm still not tired of that stuff. Yummers! It's actually been the random ass weekdays where the business and the tips have come in. Monday was alright. But Tuesday was the big story. During the week leading up to Tuesday, the actual details of the Chili's softball tournament were disclosed to me. I thought it would be some casual affair where we all show up on some public field, throw around the ball and hand out a trophy if we felt like it. Nope. Turns out we had to gather at Chili's at 5AM because our first game started at 750. In San Jose. *double take* So I stayed up way too late, of course. Got an hour and a half of sleep before driving down to meet up with everyone. Of course I just had to end up being the first one there. We donned our swank jerseys and I got to ride with Badler Crystal and Blake. Since we had some spare time before we had to be on the field, we went to Burger King for some cheesy tots. heh heh. Blake wouldn't stop talking about them, he was like a big kid. We stopped off at Albertson's too for some Powerade and a 30 rack of Bud for the trunk. We got back to the site..and I was instantly floored. It was a huge facility with I think 8 fields and we had apparently rented the entire thing for the day. And there were SO MANY PEOPLE! Sweet merciful crap, I was not expecting the turnout. And Chili's was REPRESENTIN' too. We had folks from Fresno to areas out past Sacramento. So our first game was against the district managers. That was a pretty fun game. I played third and I had a few good plays to show for the day, including a perfectly executed double play. We put up a fight that day but we couldn't pull off a win. So needless to say I'm a bit sore right now and just a bit sunburned. Fortunately, I remembered to ask for some sunscreen so it wasn't disastrous. Oh, when I arrived home, at about 4, I did some errand type things but at 5 I passed right the fuck out. And woke up at 11. The next morning I mean. I was a bit disoriented yesterday. Yeah, so that's just about where I'm at right now. Love Rustin Current Mood:  contemplativeCurrent Music: The Red by Chevelle | | Sunday, June 10th, 2007 | | 1:43 am |
On days, one of them...
Long, long day at work. Not long in hours, long in concept. I don't know what it is about people who can't find it in themselves to show up for their shifts. And I don't know how much confidence I can place in a management that gives a tremendous amount of leniency to such people. Needless to say, I worked for an hour that I won't be getting paid for. I don't mind that so much, since it helps out the closers, the people who suffer the most from a lack of crew. It's really just the fact that it boils down to people going A and B the C of D. When it really shouldn't be necessary. Anyway. Tips were pretty good so I'm not gonna complain too much. I'm determined to get to the Italian Street Painting Festival tomorrow. So if anyone remembers, call me at 11ish and make sure I'm moving. And if anyone is inclined to come along, let me know. These things are always better with a bit of company. Well, that'll be it for now. Gnight. Love Rustin Current Mood: content | | Tuesday, June 5th, 2007 | | 1:54 am |
On places to eat...or work...or both...
So. Yet again, through a series of wholly unfortunate, unforeseeable and bullshyzer circumstances, work was not so agreeable today. Shane strongly suggests that Anthony quit today because of bad things that happened the other night. Down to five servers. Wade is already on a double, as is Blake. Amanda picks up Ashlynn's expo shift so Rico and I are the only ones who can stay on the clock. So though I was the very first server on, I ended up leaving over two hours later than I should have. And I didn't even make a lot of money. Balls. Grumblors. Well, I get to do it all again today too so...great. Love Rustin | | Sunday, June 3rd, 2007 | | 1:29 am |
Whose house?
Go find the IYHWA on youtube and watch. It's spectacular. | | Saturday, June 2nd, 2007 | | 2:46 am |
On dreams...
So the other night I had a dream about Samantha and I remember thinking, within the dream that is, that she should come visit me at work. And so tonight she showed up in Chili's, straight out of the blue. Set my brainmuscles aspinning about old times. Times when I used to spend a great deal more time with her around. High school, specifically. Good times we had back in the day... Speaking of old times...well I guess the picture I have on my phone says it all. The other day I went on up to Cameron Park and visited Madeline. We talked and drove some until I saw a roadsign and I had to take a picture of it. So there's Madeline under a sign that says Memory Ln. and we quite literally took a walk down it. I thought it was remarkably appropriate. Through the course of our discussion, I discovered that Madeline had told Kim that she had received an email from me and didn't know what to do. And Kim's response response was to the tune of "If you get the chance to talk to Rustin again or be friends with him you should do it because he's a wonderful guy." Well...I have to be just a little bit flattered at such a compliment. At any rate, it's just been a tidal wave of fun and excitement over here. That might be just a hint of a stretch of a coloring of the facts. Just a smidge. Love Rustin Current Mood: Hmmm...Current Music: I'll Fly With You by Gigi D'Agostino | | Sunday, May 27th, 2007 | | 1:56 am |
| | Saturday, February 17th, 2007 | | 12:49 am |
The world, in brief.
Here I am, once again in familiar territory. Up at all hours, telling stories to no one in particular. I remember when I used to be really unsure about Livejournal...something about the distance it could create between people by discouraging actual human contact. And maybe that's true, but maybe you kind of have to get to a certain point, ya know? And now, for my day in a nutshell. I got to wake up next to my wonderful, beautiful angel, whom I adore. It's a pure joy to see her face first thing in the morning. Then came laundry like you wouldn't believe. I was in dire need of socks. Then Matsuyama for lunch. It's only the second time I've been there and I think I can legitimately add it to the categories of fodd I can choose from when foodtime rolls around. Then work, which was fairly exasperating tonight. Then a brief stop over at Colin's to see what the status of his birthday party was. Drunk people, drama, and beer pong were the order of the day. Business as usual, I would say. And it's so warm outside, I love it. I think, maybe this is the part where I wrap it up and go to play some games or anothers. So until next time. Love Rustin Current Mood: lovedCurrent Music: Nyar. | | Thursday, December 21st, 2006 | | 11:37 am |
Enter a subject, you silly bitch.
Here comes the end of the semester. I'm done with my philosophy final and I have over an hour until my art history final. Joy. At any rate, now seems about the time to make with a traditional Christmas-type post. So let's see. Yeeeeeeep...everything's still in good order. I'm reminiscing a bit now about days gone by. Mostly I'm thinking about Jackass Eve last year and how I'm determined to fix that particular flub. Seems I've already degenerated into factoid mode. Crap. Michicon went off without a hitch. Many happy returns to her once again. I work at Chili's, in case I never mentioned that to you. Come down and eat there, it's all good but it's soooooo bad for you. I'm not driving the Deathwagon anymore, because I am a pimp in such regard. Driving my GSR is totally kick ass. Danielle = totally wonderful. Seriously, you should all be jealous. Soooooo yeah. There we have it. Happy Holidays to all. A very merry Christmas. Remember, I love each and every one of you. And that's all that your life is worth. Balls. Love Rustin Current Mood:  tired | | Friday, July 14th, 2006 | | 1:20 am |
My cat.
My cat is cute. And snuggly. That is all. | | Wednesday, March 8th, 2006 | | 5:52 pm |
Of all makes shapes and models...
I'm aracin chocobos! YEEEEEEHAW! Anyway. I'm sitting down and...doing nothing so I thought I'd write a little something. Life's been good, how about you guys? Current Mood: happyCurrent Music: Fanfare! | | Wednesday, March 1st, 2006 | | 10:29 pm |
Another one of those holidays!
March 2 is National GrabAss Day! Everybody join in on America's favorite pass-time and get your mitts ready for action! I want to hear some fabulous reports, alright? First person to get the cops called on 'em gets 20 of my dollars! Current Mood: Yaharhar...Current Music: Sounds of rain. | | Thursday, February 23rd, 2006 | | 8:49 pm |
That feeling...
It's hard to explain what goes through someone's mind when they realize they've been given a second chance. For me, it was one of my...fairly rare moments of clarity. After 2 years of not speaking to each other...Danielle sent me a message, out of the blue, no pretense. So I seized the opportunity before me, remembering full well the hurt and sadness that had been mine to bear all this time. I knew I could not be afraid. I knew exactly what I had to do. And I've been amazed since that day. I'm amazed, even now, at the rekindling of a friendship that I could never really explain with words. I'm amazed that our bond has remained strong and vital all this time. I'm amazed when I look in her eyes and feel my affection....my love for her growing still, beyond what I beleived to be some kind of limit... *sigh* Our trip to Disneyland was the stuff of legend. Head to picturetrail.com for pictures. Account names are lenksta and lenksta2. |
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